last day of school

on the last day of this semester, i walked back all the way from wkwsci drinking bubble tea and listening to pearl jam. and i felt happy just to have this little pocket of time, and this irony all to myself. the irony that no one else can spot.

gosh, i really screwed up this semester.

Insomnia

one of those songs that i am embarrassed to like. but i like.

i don't know what to make of it, when this girl in one of my project groups saw my e-mail signature and had a very... strange reaction. she was flustered and pointing at it and didn't find any words to say.

this is my signature.

"--
For You have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, and my feet from falling. I will walk before the Lord in the land of the living."

and i wonder why i didnt even ask.

natural advantage

in this matter we know as school, i have no clear natural advantage in any way at all.

unlike a privileged some, i never had the good fortune to pick up good learning habits in a top school nor did i grow up competing with the nation's best. i do not have the luxury of having a tutor to guide me in my studies, and i never did in my life.

i probably arrived a little later than some, having never really designed or written or picked up skills that can help me in my course right now. Things like photography, final cut or adobe. neither can i afford the best camera, laptop or whatever schiznit that can help, a lot.

what i do have, is this crazed obsession to make something out of my life that pops by every now and then, and a naive, little hope that it is never too late to start.

and you know what?

it was, but it never is.

stay back, keep clear

erm, i typed a whole chunk of what one might say is controversial and politically charged shit.

then i remembered how i've been learning that i should probably not make too many decisions when i'm under stress.

so just do that.

stay back, keep clear. both you and i.