was at vigilante for the past two days. a little tired from it, but it was a surprisingly ok task.

right now, i'm tanned in such a strange way, that if i were to lie down naked on the road, you'd think i'm a badly painted zebra crossing stained with monkey blood.

so rehearsal tomorrow, playing bass for yf on sunday and monday's an off-day. and it's on to senang on tuesday - i really need more days off!

gosh my brain is sunfriedmush now.

spellcheck's irritating.

i really shouldn't let one person's hurtful words affect my ministry. well, i'm just gonna blog about what has really encouraged me these couple of days.

1. "The one I love", a song written by gaius, that we recorded two years ago. just got hold of the mp3 from ros today, and i had quite a pleasant surprise. it actually sounded pretty decent, though there are quite a lot of not-so-good parts here and there. and i sounded better than i thought i did in there. eric, if you're reading this, you really should hear this. come ask me why.. :)

2. Meeting up with people i don't run into on a regularly basis. e.g. gabs and walter. it's some sort of relieve talking to people, really. up till ymlc, when i shared with the ppl in church about my problem, i had always kept everything in me, or only told a couple of very close friends about it. right now, i'm just glad that there are people who care enough to talk to me even though we don't really need/see each other in everyday life.

3. Bible verses, the one benny ho talked about yesterday, matt 7:11 (if you then who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children..) and Psalms 94(Does He who implanted the ear not hear, does He who formed the eyes not see?) These two verses was a real comfort, healing balm/crutches to some things i am facing right now.

4. Finally a few days off following last weekends hectic combination of camp and ttsh.

afternoon off

Saturday: Booked in 8am for duty
Sunday: Booked out 8am from duty
Booked in night for monday's tasking
Monday: Departed camp for tuas then southern islands at 4am, secured from tasking at 8pm

For my whole weekend burnt, i got this afternoon off. Well, i can't say that it's that bad because i had already shifted my duty off to friday. but half a day off for 16hours of work? hmm.

Spent last weekend's bookout time mostly at ttsh. I hope everything's alright from now on.

that's all for now. i've got a lot on my mind.

massive

i was just thinking about how wonderful it'd be to lose yourself in a place with a great multitude of stuff. two things i can think of right off are libraries and mega cd shops.

books and cds are such a good thing to lose yourself amongst, because each of them has an identity on their own, so much so that it'll take away the importance of you and all that you are.

haven't got much of a weekend to look forward to. loved one getting cut up tmr, duty on saturday, and no church to go to on sunday. maybe i'll drop by the library or hmv tomorrow and spend my day mooning about.

oh well, things can only get better from here on. :)

i'm holding on

i'm trying really hard to hold on, but there're just too many things going down.

i'm trying really hard, i really am.

how far we've come

i've just been waiting for this for the longest time ever.



27 days from now, if their website is correct.

27!